Good Bye 2008 Hello 2009

Another panning shot(photo atop)? Dunno. Running photos taken by MNM, my husband.


In a day....we are all facing the 2009 and will bid goodbye to 2008.

It was a great year for me.....I run, I climbed, I became a better person. Maybe this morning run at the naga city sports complex (400m oval) will be my last run. After more than two weeks of no run....I only did 4K today....hay! In my wishlist I wanted a 10K PR. Well I guess, this one is fine than not having any stride at all.

The world economic crisis brings somewhat a blessing in disguise. Our company decided a long shutdown that enabled me to spend more time with my family during this holiday season.

Here are some of the photos from our vacation.

Photo from the top: 1st photo: taken by my hubby at the stair of my mother's house (from Left Karen, Mom, TJ, Me and Matti); Me, TJ & Matti after we bid goodbye to Karen at the Sabang Partido port (she's off to Caramoan peninsula); The boat, my shot using MNM D40 at 90mm focal length, f/6.3, ISO200-does it merit a good composition?; Palm trees of sabang-raw material for tiklad (Nipa roof); GOA church; Tigaon church belfry; TJ & Matti at CWC Cabana; TJ & Matti enjoying the greens of CWC, MNM shot at focal length 200mm; CWC infinity pool.

Running blog #10: Thoughts....Hiiro Kakashi.....Long breaks.....etc

Yesterday afternoon my fever subsided.
While on sick leave I started a word play with Hiiro Kakashi. Yah am playing my imagination with a character and took sometime to bring her out of my frame.
I was awaken today clearing my throat....I'm probably not yet OK. But I dont want to be stucked again all day at home. By the way, yesterday I leave home around 4 PM to grab a few gift wrappers. Wow! The mall was just too crowded.

So I woke up hubby, I ask him if he'd like to run. He agreed on it....maybe because he needed it for the extra caloric consumption during the holiday feast. We tag along the kids......

So I did a 2 laps of run at the island cove at a pace of 7 min/km. Kinda slow in time and mileage....I just can't run that hard....I'm busy imagining.

Well, it's been a long time I hadn't had this long break.
I'm busy thinking what to do.....I even regretted I got sick on the last day of work. Starting monday we had a plant shutdown and we all will be back to work on the 5th of January 2009. It's having a half month break (It's a whooping 15 days off!) Can you imagine? When I first heard about it....I wanted to go home to our province immediately on the 20th. But hubby insisted that he still has work to do...a very important project that requires his attention until the 24th.

Maybe, we can still visit our province on the 26th and be back on the 2nd. We need to bring back the kids to the pulmo on the 3rd.....so my 15 days off were slashed down to 7 days...the 8 days I have to crunch the gift wrapping, a whacko party, the tidying up of clutters, run, going to the gym and maybe tutoring matti about writing (if I have the patience....wah! I confesed am not a good teacher.)

I cannot concentrate on my run and my plans for the family....my writing about Hiiro Kakashi is just squeezing in my mind, it's like an internet ad that keeps on popping on the side. Why can't I turn off the pop-ups. I suddenly remember when I was kid, I just have a lot of things in my mind....my imagination is just so vivid that I have to write about it. My mother even said I even act on it....they saw me talking like I am with someone....an imaginary friend? I guess as I grew up, I lost the naivete of that world....I am now jaded by mundane concerns of everyday living, surviving...this is life.

But blogging bring me back some kiddo in me.......I started writing yesterday to beat the boredom. I guess am starting to hate it....cause it gets in my head. So I have to write the next thing that happened to Hiiro. Here it is:

HIIRO KAKASHI 2

Hiiro's encounter with Timothy becomes a routine.
They would eat together at the cafeteria. Timothy would drive her off to their house or sometimes pick her up from her work. They would run together. Sometimes they would just sit together in a park without much to talk about....let time passed.
Maybe, this is what bestfriend is all about Hiiro thought.


In one of Hiiro and Sofia's studies....Hiiro recounts to Sofia about her new found friend she was beaming with happiness. Sofia was giggling "You're in love!" she said. "No! I guess he is the bestfriend I never had." Hiiro retorted back. "Besides, I can't love him." she insisted. "But why? " Sofia inquired. "Because he can never love me back." Hiiro said softly. "The kind of story you told me, I can sense that he is in love you." Sofia mused. "How is that possible?" Hiiro replied with defiance. "I just know!" came Sofia's reply "I guess you should ask him." Then a long silence.


Hiiro is academically good, she is smart and practical. She is brave...she doesn't care....she has no beauty to take care of anyway she thought so why fear....let alone people fear her fiery eyes.

She gained her father's love when she started bringing honor for the family....she has always been the top of her class. But her mother doesn't care about it. Her mother only think the superficial in her mind "Beauty transcends everything." Her father on the other hand regretted why she became a daughter instead a son....He could have given her his time, his attention, his love. Hiiro becomes a domestic issue between the spouse....when the father came to Hiiro's aide this becomes an issue with the mother for intervening the discipline in the household. So her father loved her in silence.


Hiiro's thought about her parents were interrupted by Timothy. He tossed 3 bars of cadbury hazel nut chocolate bar in front of her. It's Hiiro's favorite treat. "Thinking deeply huh!" Timothy blurted out. "Yah! am thinking about my mom." came Hiiro's sad reply. "Why?" "Anything wrong? Something happened?" Timothy enquired. Hiiro laughed at the sight of Timothy's face, he looked worried. "Oh! no. Nothing. I was just thinking about my relationship with her." Timothy's face softened. "Wanted to talk about it?" He gave her an encouraging smile.
So Hiiro relate to Timothy her very sour relationship with her mother....she cannot help but cry....It was mixed emotion....part of her feels relieved for sharing her life....part of her feels ashamed that her mother is not a person of substance...this is the first time that she relates her story to someone and it made her felt vulnerable....she was sobbing....she was asking why God has given her this kind of face that a mother cannot love.
Timothy hold her tight....he doesn't know what to say....how can a mother not love her own child. He wiped away her tears and grabbed the chocolate bar and tear opened it and offerred Hiiro to have some...."You'll feel better." He said....he can feel the lump on his throat....he pity this girl....she is special to him and he doesn't think she is ugly as she repeatedly said it.
Hiiro smiled politely and eat the chocolate. Yah it felt better she thought. Timothy squeezed her shoulder and they moved closer. Hiiro snug her head across Timothy's muscled chest...she felt so secured. They sat in silence until darkness fell.

Hiiro went home late.
Her mother scolded her because Sofia has to wash the dishes. "It's OK mom!" Sofia shouted to defend her sister. Then the roaring argument went on.

Hiiro locked to her bedroom...not because she's mad. She cannot contain her feelings she felt the love around her....Timothy, Sofia and her dad. Imagine, Sofia and her dad came to defend her from her mom. "If I can only save this time.....I'll go back time and again....." she thought. This is the happiest day of her life. She was talking to herself in between prayers...she was crying....tears of joy......then came her pondering question....when can mom love me.

Sofia stormed in her room and as soon as she closed the door, she was giggling and been relentlessly asking Hiiro where she had been...."Stop cryin' sissy....I bet you were out on a date!" she was beamingly happy for her sister.



I have been writing for several hours now....I guess this is enough. I can hear the kids. I guess I have to yoga to clear my head........this is a little scary when something is stuck in my head.

Fiction: Hiiro Kakashi

I am always attempting to write something fictional and this is one of them. The title is still a "working" title.
When I was in highschool I would just write anything, an essay, short story or poem- I was a member of our paper organ....I even thought I'm gonna be a writer someday....But I realized I lost the flair. I can't even compose now.....
Writing is just an opportunity when I am not allowed to talk because of sore throat,
so I decided to just play the words and see until when can my imagination sustain. This is about a girl.



HIIRO KAKASHI

There was a girl named Hiiro Kakashi, she was given a japanese name but was not born with japanese parents nor in a japanese country.


Maybe the parents were so hooked up to the naruto series that when their eldest was born they named it after the infamous character kakashi. But why kakashi? Kakashi is a male character with eyes always covered.....maybe because the parents really wanted a baby boy or perhaps the unsightly difference in her eyes made the parents decide to name her after the male character kakashi who's eyes is always masked. "Hiiro" shall define her as a girl because hiiro means scarlet red or maybe because her eyes is like a scar....the parents life scarred.



Hiiro grew up shy. Low self-esteem, with few friends....she lived so ashamed of her eyes. She felt like if the eyes is the window of her soul....her window has no drapings and theres just no light that shone upon it.



The little Hiiro knows that her sister is much favored by her parents. She never get to buy new dress, despite the fact that she is the eldest...she instead have the hand me downs from Sofia who is much taller than her.



Their age gap is just one year. But even as child many people mistake Sofia as the eldest....and they never thought of them as siblings. Hiiro is like some curse to her parents....they find her so odd that they disown her from their family. She was treated like the house hold helper's child.





Sofia on the otherhand has a soft heart for Hiiro- but the mother does not encourage the feelings. She wanted to see Hiiro serve Sofia. For Sofia's face and beauty is the perfect visual of a daugther never mind Hiiro.


Hiiro has no idea about love from her parents. She get used to it. Sometimes she wanted to hug her mother, she even wonder if as baby she was cuddled by her mom. She understands it...her mom is beautiful just like Sofia, her father is goodlooking...maybe it's true she is someone else' child or got swapped during birth...she wouldn't know. But in her heart she know Sofia is her sister she is important to her. When their parents are away they would just play like they were twins....Sofia loved her, Sofia would just dress her up with her clothes and turn her into a pretty girl, she find Hiiro beautiful....and she'll whisper "You are beautiful. They just can't see it." Their closeness was kept secret to their parents.


But as they grew up the relationship falter. Sofia found her friends while Hiiro has to work hard.



She has to work for her college...while Sofia is enjoying the life of coed where let worries live to oblivion.

Hiiro studied in a state university while Sofia studied in a private university.

Sofia have so many suitors. She busy herself with parties, friends, her social life flourish.


While Hiiro is just working day and night to cope up with the growing need for self support. She still has to work at home as she is considered the house hold help. Sofia's nanny has retired already after so many years of working in their household. Nanny Lala she considers her mother....the love she longed for her mother was willingly given to her by Lala....but she is old now, her age twice the age of Hiiro's mom.





So now, Hiiro has to do the laundry for the family, clean up the house, and have to give Sofia tutor from time to time. During their studies together Sofia would complaint from Hiiro..."I missed you sister."
Hiiro would just give her a sigh "I have to work...I needed to finish my studies....They would never love me....You have everything!" "But I never have your brain" come Sofia's reply.
"Maybe my brain covered my eyes that's why I got that Kakashi look hahaha!" Hiiro's reply. She can never take a positive compliment. She was sure she was cursed....maybe because even during pregnancy her mother would watch that crazy anime in her time. And she gets all the blame for being ugly.

Sometimes when Hiiro felt she is too ugly to live earth....she would run relentlessly.....off to the road, to the dirt until she can no longer stride. After her run, she would gasp for air and feel a lot better she is alive.....then she will mumble "Hmmmm runner's high! you kept me sane". Leaving home and living alone is part of her option but that will take her away from her sister...Nanny Lala left and she only have Sofia to love.





Her days would go like that - work -school -run-work at home.


She doesn't have a social life....she's too afraid to get to know other people. If her mother detest her....how much more other people...they will never like her, she thought.





But maybe the gods got bore about how she handles her life....so plain, so dull........in one of her run....somebody skidded out of nowhere- a man was running behind her she never get to know someone was there....maybe because she never bother to look behind. Well, who in their right brain would look back while running. She thought for a while. She's not used to run with company. "Hi! It's Timothy!" said the guy. She can't barely talk all she did was just to give him a curt nod. Maybe that is enough to pay respect she cannot just make friends with anybody....she run faster and he ate her dust.






The following day Hiiro came to school from her job at a nearby library, her head is a little droop while walking briskly to get to her next class in Science building. Suddenly, the man who introduced himself Timothy to her the other day appear in front of her. "Hi! I didn't get your name. Remember me Timothy?" Hiiro responded by looking behind her....so the man was talking to him. She saw the most beautiful good looking smile next to Sofia. So she smiled hesitantly - "Hiiro....Hiiro Kakashi"...."And am no japanese".....He laughed. "You run fast....would you like to enlist in the track and field team?" He said. " I really don't have time for longer practice run. I work." came her reply. She dismissed the conversation...but Timothy kept his pace with her. And she realize they were classmates.


I know...this piece is not yet finish but am gonna publish it anyway....am still wondering how am I gonna close the story.......I guess this is what become of me when I don't run, my imagination becomes so fertile and it rambles with a lot of things. My brain is filled with a lot of details...fiction (my brain tells me it wanted to write just anything...it wanted to imagine the image of Hiiro Kakashi), but the reality buttons keep on signalling an alarm....whoa!
Reality bites it's 6 days before christmas and theres a lot to do.
The doctors didn't clinic today (whining) maybe because its almost holiday!
And I guess I'll self medicate again so I can enjoy the holiday.
Maybe I'll just tell the doctor next year about this....that I have to do this on my own....because they were never around when I needed them. That being well during the holiday is an option and that going back to the previous prescription is also an option because am still feeling the same.....I guess is this better than doing nothing.....
And signing off is also an option so I can do more.
Ciao....merry christmas!

Running blog #9: Low....low....low

My running activity is really low.

This must have affected my not being able to run during the PMA Fun Run last Sunday.

Yes, after 3 weeks of ardous training- I didn't run last Sunday.

Hmmm....yah it really reminds me of KOTR (Adidas King of the Road).



At least during KOTR, I have valid reason I was puking prior the run.....

But last Sunday....well I just didn't woke up on time :-(



I haven't run for 5 days now.

And I'm feelin a little low...low....low....

But I can't just run, kids are having their 3rd quarter exam, it's my turn to lead and facilitate the review. Maybe, I'll try to run again by Thursday.
But I know I won't give up running.....I'll keep on.

Running blog #8: Saturday Practice Run and etc

Saturday Practice Run


Even if hubby had party Friday night....and comes home really early morn Sat (Honestly, I never noticed it huh! must have dozed terribly.) I still got my practice run....though a little late with my usual PR start time.

Gee, I woke up late around 6:30 AM...had my practice run before 7 AM at the island cove and did a 5K, but never got to time it. I guess its acceptable....considering it's just my tempo run. Nevertheless, I run slow and fast in an alternating lap.

After the PR we took the kids to the pulmo pedia. TJ & Matti's cough is irritating me and makes me feel anxious. It really makes me nervous when the kids are having colds and cough....anything related to lungs or respiratory illness is something that scares me....for the reason that these children were born short of 6 weeks from fullterm, they were delivered by CS, they had steriod while in my womb (to provide surfactant to make their lungs more mature and save us from the high costs of incubator in NICU). These known facts makes me all queasy whenever they are having this common colds and cough. I just can't relax.

So my hunch is correct the kids are asthmatic...their lungs really sensitive to the change in weather. They were given medication (Seretide and montemax) and will be observed for one month. Their condition is something that I realize might spoil whatever plan we have this holiday. :-(




...and ETC...


Today the kids went to a children party....it's the 1st bday party of Kat2, daughter of one of hubby's friend Andy.

It was nice seeing his friends and colleagues again. It was an opportunity to keep up with lost communication and short "Howdy" to everyone.

The kids go gaga at the sight of jollibee and hetty.

But then just like any other party at the end, one of them were crying because they didn't get the prized toy during the games.


Matti gets excited in the coloring activity





TJ beams with happiness- dances with mouth filled with jollibee food. :-)





My concept of contrast- TJ & Manny, Young & Adult, Girl & Boy, Happy & Grumpy :-)




After the party we went to MMC to get Matti's lab result....he was fine with the KOH (this is a test on the white spot that hubby is picking on for the past months).....the test says it's just a white spot and not some kind of fungal skin disorder......Whew!

Again the kids won't settle in just going home straight from MMC....They wanted to have a little stroll in MOA. These kids are just so into MOA. I guess they love the ambiance and there's just a lot of people


Striked a pose at MOA's giant christmas tree by the bay

Thoughts....thoughts....thoughts

Photo by Maam Angie Olivar- during our Mt Maculot traverse- I just thought that this pic depicts my blog today. :-)

Thought #1:

The MRP is still a great buzz around the company...though I am dealing with now two customer issues....which busy me every moment.....a sudden consciousness of my environment still make me feel a little different about the idea that we are losing colleagues....Whoooo life.

Thought #2:

Yesterday, I went to gym for my Xtraining (see previous blog regarding my training plans).

I did some weight lifting targetting the chest, triceps & shoulder. I spent an hour and a half to complete my routine.

I don't have much connection with the people in that gym. I actually don't know their names except for the trainer and the gym owner (whos always around). I felt like am a ghost...besides nobody notices me- I am so focused in getting my muscle out (hehehe outa where it hides from the underneath the fat :-)

I have been going to this gym for about a month now. I spent an hour and a half every Tue & Thurs and I guess I started gaining some mass (I started at 115 lbs, last Mon I weigh 121 lbs)

Sometimes I wonder if my lack of chat with the people there(which isn't my type) can be interpreted as being snobbed. I guess, I am just after my objective, the weights are kinda challenging ( I keep my focus there) and I don't have much time to socialize- I need to get home early for the kids. Curt smile and few lines that's all I can offer. I just hope they don't find me so aloof.....Yah, this isn't so me....I realize in some situation my split personality comes out. Some people who really knew me would think I'm cloaked.

Thought #3:

Hmmmm....too much load of that schizophrenic idea....

Heck, there is an adventure this coming January- thrill of the trail a trail run sponsored by TNF. It's a 20K Trail Run. How close am I to do this adventure???

Well, probably the answer will come out if I am able to run a 20K mileage in one practice run.

Wow...Should I ever consider revising my training plan? And would it be possible to include trail as additional PR activity?

Thought #4:

"What will you do if someone admitted to you that He/She has a crush on you?" This text message from a friend struck with an "Aha!" Hey I'm outtta puberty age....hey am not a college doll anymore....where have you been....time warp?!? Why ask this question.... Hehehe Did it ever occurred to me? Huwat! I got some short hair huh!

What struck me most is the follow up text message...."What to do when spouse read the message?" Huh? I just don't know the correct answer...maybe just tell the truth.

I find it really really funny....reminds me of hmmmm those were the days. ...so as usual I thought the right response to the text message is "My friend are you in some midlife crisis...." nyahahaha I thought we all are in economic crisis :-)But the thing is it never fails to flatter you when someone finds you attractive. So hey it's just a crush....nothing else.

Thought #5:

I am sleepy...Is hubby still partying out there cause....am spending too much thoughts in my blog.

What about my PR tomorrow???..Wahhhhhhhhhhh....I need mileage!

Running blog #7: 120308 Practice Run

Yesterday was my first run for the month of December.
The weather is just right.
I leave my cube at 5:03PM, I was at the SRC- gym by 5:09 PM.
I was a little tied up by the drama of MRP events that took place in our company.

I was in the changing room when Carmel arrived.She is one of GT's running enthusiast.
We agreed to run together....this is the first time am running with her.
I had a few good stretch and afterwards we were off the road.
We agreed on a steady slow pace we run the infamous route of JAE-Telford-JAE (see google illustration in my previous blog). Carmel is such a good company, she is very sporty, and likes to talk as well while jogging. I think she's been regularly running for maybe 3 months. Her stamina amazes me....she can carry a conversation very well. And she's running with water.
We had a good talk about our common friends, guys with really flat tummy we envied nyahahaha, etc etc....its a quick talk about work and life. I feel really comfortable with Carmel even if we rarely have sometime alone together. In my mind I was thinking like am gonna ask her to run with me again sometime. Or maybe next year we could arrange to become a regular running buddy. I happened to remember her plans to go to Bora this christmas vacation so I brought it up...I can sense even on vacation she'll take with her running. Suddenly as we were approaching WDC she told me that she's staying in the company until Dec 19....Huwat! It came to me in a big surprise! I was still contemplating about the MRP that happened these past few days and I really felt a little different with the idea that certain people are leaving the company...and here I am talking to someone whose resigning and am not gonna see regularly after the season.

Well, Dec 19 will be our last day of operation and will be back next year by Jan 5. I can imagine what its like when were back....some empty cubes, usual faces that you regularly see won't be around....organizational change is very definite. Some people will be transferred to another. I am definitely not affected by this change....my scope of work will be the same. But the people am gonna talk to will probably be different.

Some of those on MRP were really really happy- the package that the company provide is indeed rewarding. However, some other people whose comfort zone have been the company find it difficult to leave....its a mixed of emotion really....I have seen it. And this is all because of the world economic crisis....no one is indispensable.....no job is stable....this is all in my mind as we reach our starting point to complete the 5.3K, we were at a pace of 8:00 min per km. After some few steps I bid Carmel "see ya later" I guess she'll do 5K only. I need to run a little more mileage and build some speed.....the MRP is at the back of my mind. As I passed the SRC I saw guys from engineering in their basketball game. I headed to GT GT front facade, left turn to WDC it was a little uphill down hill on the corner I right turn to Telford and the Enomoto, Maxim back again to GT - I guess I must have completed an 8 K practice run....sure it was not enough....not much time....its too dark.....the future is dark....I don't know but I have to trust God -we will all rise from this economic crisis....life is a cycle...

1st day of December

Hmmmm the morning breeze of December 1, 2008.

I didn't know what time I slept last night, I'm not drunk of alcohol....I was drunk of a lotta work.

I wasn't able to do my practice run today because I woke up late....gosh it was 7:30 AM.

I know I heard the alarm at 5 AM and have been nudging hubby for the island cove PR, but he didn't even move....so I guess I envied his deep slumber that I fell asleep again.

The kids are "chocolit" hehehe (another wordplay)- they've been bothering their dad and asking for a MOA trip....nyahahaha they weren't successful yesterday. But you know kids they wouldn't give up. And they know just how to get what they want. Yesterday, hubby proves to be smarter...the kids slept all afternoon and the trip to MOA was a forgotten gimmick....so that explain why I had two blog entries yesterday.

Today, I decided to have this blog entry maybe because I can't make up my mind of what to do with the ruined plan to run today.

I have been reviewing my program for Dec 14 PMA FUN RUN-Yes we wiill be running with the Philippine Military Academy, Roel from GT had us registered last Friday. The fun run will be held in AFP GHQ, Camp Aguinaldo Grandstand. I don't know if we stand a chance with these guys.....but I'd like to take my run to them and see where I am. Many running enthusiast from ADGT will participate on this event....and I am excited about it.

Below table (actually a converted picture) is my training plan for Dec 14 race.

Boy! why is blogger not alowing to post table from excel or word.....I had difficulty adjusting the image crunch to make it more readable (well some kinda' limitation).

For my WW1 mileage I was short of 4.5K....I wasn't running much on my long run training day (Wed).

I am still on track with my WW2 training plan but today I haven't done a cross training or gym-so we call this a rest day. Though, I am considering to do some simple yoga pause (Anyway, still early I'll see how I can manage to get myself at least a solitude of an hour. Hey! am not blogging in solitude....its usually in between "chocoliting" with kids or some other more).

So on Wednesday I really have to do 10K run at GBP with slower pace of 7:36 to prevent any injury.

My problem is how am I gonna run this Friday-8K? I never run on Fridays....I guess the option will be to run on Saturday hmmmm (I'm keeping my fingers cross i hope hubby will accompany me, wooo....need some bribing :-)).

Saturday should have 7-8 laps in island cove. And on sunday 3-4 laps.....promise promise I'll keep it in my head.

....I heard hubby gave in to the kids requests. :-) MOA or something.... so that's a signal that its ciao for now.

P.S.

Multi-tasking is one of my thing or talent you call it.

Just a trivia, TJ & I were working on her assignment while am bloggin' hehehe.

There is also "chocoliting" on the side :-)