Sunday, August 1, 2010

Confession of the running mom

I have missed running so much. As much as I hate to admit the truth.... but not being able to run crept to my sanity-  yes it involves having spikes in my mood. Oh! and when finally I got to get a date with my husband to run, I have to control myself to prevent any injury for my Rexona run race.
After nature's valley run (where I received 1000km finisher shirt),  my running routine almost none.
I struggled with my training when the school year started. Early morning is usually trying to pacify my baby boy who tantrums when woked up at the wee hours of the morning- they have to be up by 5AM for the 7AM class (and we all have to sleep before 9PM and my kids won't just sleep without mom or dad...oh! and there's the assignments)...imagine my mileage dropped to 5Km total for June, making it impossible to do the milo marathon- month's back my ambition is to do my 2nd full mary with Milo....but it seems it was not destined to happen. So I let go of that race besides it was quite difficult to register. Now I realized that perhaps it was a blessing in disguise- because I have read a lot of complaints regarding the conduct of the race- like hydration station without water??? too much sun exposure etc etc. But I cannot speak about it since I was not on the race.

July progressed to 10Km - my monthly mileage whew! And after the milo marathon, the news of death scares me off the more. I feel like I can't run anymore- suddenly, the danger of running becomes so real to me. Maybe, I have this feeling because I am also guilty of not properly hydrating- I remember I used to run 10K without water. Also,I like running alone- than running with someone. I guess I'm such a bad company- that only my husband can stick to me all through out (lol! at least there is one person who can withstand running beside me)...

When I was new to running I would always rummage in the runners world for an article about training and safety. Well, honestly I can't spare some budget for a coach- so I decided to get coaching from my reading on the internet  at first it was just the runnersworld then  I discovered the bull runner, bald runner and all sites are reputable in bringing in useful information for newbie and seasoned runners. Those days, I thought that death in running is quite high among elite athletes who have been pushing so hard to reduce finish time like that of Ryan Shay.....I never thought it could happen to recreational athlete like us. Though in the US there were reported cases of death in a race....but it didn't bother me much- I was thinking that perhaps, people there are too competitive maybe because running as a sport have reached certain level of maturity. However, the death of a fellow filipino runner brings chill on my spine...specially because I am not good in keeping up with my training. If it happened to someone...could it happen to me?
Then I got invited to run 21k in a dailymile challenge dubbed as "Tribute For The Milo Runners Who Died"....hmmm I don't know how soon will I be able to complete it. But decided to do the Rexona Run to comply with the challenge. And besides it will be a bonus motivation to get back to training.
When I got a chance to read the article about the runner who died in Milo Marathon- the faceless man becomes is a guy who used to work in the semicon company in gateway business park. Then I asked myself- did he run in my playground? did I get to see him on those days that I run more than  3-4x a week?....I felt so sorry for his family, for his children and to him for not making it to the finishline with 1.1 km to go. I hope this guy rest in peace.

His story...made me feel sad...made me ask- will I continue to run a race? or is really running a sport for me? Momentarily I stopped. There was loneliness in my heart. I asked myself this question because of my current situation- it's been two months since classes started, but I haven't adjusted my training schedule.

 I pushed myself to run again because of this fellow runner. Even if I barely know him I decided to run for him or them anyway.
Oh! and when I reached the 19.9 km distance this morning- I got goosebumps...I don't know if it's the heat....on my left I can see overflowing water (earlier there is a pang of guilt because I know in some parts of metro manila people clamour for water). Then I remember again this runner who died- according to reports water was not available for him to hydrate- which significantly increased his risks of heatstroke and eventually to his untimely death.

With tons of reasons for skipping all the training- days back, I decided to use every opportunity to condition my using the stairs instead of elevators or escalators, engaging my core muscles when lifting heavy items (instead of asking hubby to do it), walking certain distance instead of calling a cab for a ride, sweating it out while cleaning the house instead of asking the helper to do it (since I am not even satisfied even if I explained the method of cleaning the nth time-whew! as if were not speaking on the same language), frequent visit to the attic that feels like an oven or some sauna (just to simulate the humidity and heat exposure) and getting to my airclimber at least once a week (lol and call it an exercise).

Today's race- I am guilty,  I didn't train or prepare because I choose to become a better mother, wife, and homekeeper (also grumpy at times).
Today, I woke up for the race and immediately throw away that competitive side of me. I headed to the race armed with my love for this sport. And I thank the race organizer/director for keeping us safe by providing us more than enough hydration supply.
And I thank God for I get to run a race- finish it at a very slow pace (2:45:35). My heart is screaming out loud with the joy that this 21Km distance brings to me.

My run today- brings a different level of awareness....perhaps I'm lucky today I got my medal (or is it just about the medal?)...but  what about  some other race day?...I need to be better on my training. Which reminds me of the last leg of trilogy where I have to run 32Km- there is no turning back...though there is option to downgrade to 10K(?)- but I must do it....I need another marathon....I guess my calling is the long distance run.

My 5th medal for the 21K distance- very nice quality almost comparable to my TBR DM medal.

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